I have been dreading writing this post, because it means I have to admit I failed. I quit the trainer after 10 weeks. I can say that the reason was because I was gaining too much weight and the trainer wasn't working. However the real reason is that I let my mind get the better of me. I let negative thoughts over power the positive, and I lost control. I did learn a lot about myself through this process though in that I learned where I need to improve. Over the last four years, I have continuously gone through cycles of crash dieting and binge eating. When I thought I failed and gave up on the trainer, another cycle of binge eating began, like eating an entire box of cookies for dinner.
All in all, I was just mentally and physically drained. I wish I would've completed the last two weeks of the trainer; however, I don't regret giving myself a break either. My focus has shifted from losing weight to improving my relationship with food and myself. My focus is now on my health.
I have started a new program that will help me learn how to intuitively eat and also increase my metabolism. Throughout all of those cycles of crashing and binge eating, I believe that I have messed up my metabolism, so I will be working to build it up slowly as well. I am trying IIFYM (If It Fits Your Macros). For more information, you can check out www.iifym.com. Basically what I am doing is reverse dieting. I am starting at crash diet level and slowly building up my metabolic tolerance, so to speak, increasing carbohydrate, fat, calorie and fiber intake. My protein intake will be the same throughout the whole 22 week process. I am able to eat whatever I want with no restrictions as long as it fits into the day's macros in grams of fat, protein, carbohydrates and fiber. I also must stay within my calorie intake. My intake has been personally calculated based on my size and needs.
It will definitely be a process, but I truly believe that this will help me get out of my cycle.
If you have been keeping up with my posts about the trainer, I am not saying that it doesn't work at all. All diets and workouts work differently for every individual person. I loved the workouts and will continue to use them throughout my reverse diet. Also, my cousin chose to do the trainer with me; however, she chose to intuitively eat healthy. It worked for her, so I would definitely suggest trying the trainer, especially if you are new to weight training and want to learn more about working out.
Thank you all for reading and being so patient with me. I won't be doing daily posts anymore, but I will be posting again soon with spaghetti squash cooking instructions and hopefully progress and more recipes!